Dear United Airlines,

Spoiler alert: this is NOT a complaint letter.


On May 11, 2016, I flew with my husband to San Diego from Columbus with a layover in Chicago. Upon boarding the second flight I realized that I had left my Kindle in the seatback pocket on the first plane. I notified a flight attendant, gave her a description of the Kindle, and she said she would see what she could do. At some point during the flight, she found me and said that they had tried calling the gate agent to no avail and suggested that I fill out a Lost Item form on United's website.

I filled out the form and received several update emails that United was "still searching" for the Kindle. I had described it as best as I could, but I had bought it from my friend Lisa so I didn't know the serial number. I said it had a burgundy case with an attached light and that it was called "Gila's Kindle."

I knew that you would only search for my item for 30 days, and after two weeks my hope was waning, but on June 2nd I received a voicemail, a text and an email letting me know that it had been found! I filled out more information and I did have to pay for shipping (but I didn't mind since it was my own dumb fault that it was missing in the first place) and that same day I received tracking information. I admit to being overly excited about this.

The Kindle arrived at my home on June 6th, and we have been reunited.

I'm writing this for two reasons:

1. I want to thank the blonde flight attendant on Flight 649 on May 11th for not only finding me on the plane to tell me that she had tried to locate the Kindle, but also for letting me know about the Lost Item form. It seems like common sense, but I don't know that I would have thought to look for such a thing myself. I'm sorry that I didn't get her name.
   
   
2. I want to publicly thank United Airlines for this excellent customer service. Too often we are much more likely to express displeasure rather than praise. I want anyone willing to read this to know how much I appreciate getting my Kindle back after I was foolish enough to leave it behind.

Thank you again,

Gwen Carmack

More Pain in the Ass Things About Breast Cancer

So here we are, four weeks out of the big surgery. I did a pre-op version of superficial things that pissed me off about having cancer (you can read it here if you missed it) and today I have a post-op edition. You know me, there will probably be more to come...

Grooming. I've been fortunate in that I haven't had limitations moving my arms. I could wash my hair the first time I showered after surgery, and luckily with my curly hair and a good cut, air drying works well. But I can't quite shave my legs. Aaron says he won't do it, and frankly I wouldn't want him to. Thank Target for maxi skirts. I also didn't make time for a pedicure before surgery so my feet and toes are less than lovely. I might be able to go get one done here sometime soon but obviously I can't do my own.

I did get my nails done last week!
OPI "Green on the Runway"

Lack of strength. One day, about a week after I got home from the hospital, Aaron called around lunchtime and said that he didn't know if he could get home to feed me. I said that was OK, that I thought I could make a smoothie for myself. We have a handy dandy NutriBullet, and everything was lightweight and within reach. Well, I made the smoothie with no problem, but I couldn't unscrew the container to be able to consume it. I had to text Aaron and ask him to just stop by and help. As Steph said, at least I got to third base with the smoothie.

Clothing. Until I'm told otherwise, I have to wear a surgical bra. I have two of them, so while one is in the laundry I can wear the other one. (Oh, that leads me to another thing: the need to do laundry nearly every day.) It's white and bulky, with thick velcro straps, and just not very flattering. Granted, it's still too early to even know what size bra to get but it drives me crazy just the same.

Sexy, right? (Also, upside down)

Missing out. This is becoming less of an issue, but I do still have to choose carefully what events I'm going to attend. I get tired easily and while I don't have "pain" pain, I am very sore. Last weekend was Comfest and we still had our annual brunch on Saturday. I parked myself in a chair while wearing a tiara and held court. Sunday I actually made it to the festival, but I may have overdone it a bit, as Monday was spent not moving a whole lot.

Things that don’t suck: Our friends. We had a lot of help Saturday both for the brunch and afterward, when some of the neighbors landed back at our place for a late dinner. And people always say we have great parties, but a big reason for that is the mix of people from different parts of our life who come together beautifully.

And then there was this. Allyson has a business called The Scrabble Chick. She makes jewelry using Scrabble tiles and normally she and her husband have a booth at Comfest but they didn't this year, so they were able to come to the brunch. Allyson gave me this bracelet:

In case you're wondering, the other side of the tile is a "G."

I cried. Aaron cried. She gave me some extras of the tiles so Aaron immediately put one on a chain and wore it around his neck. You can find The Scrabble Chick on Facebook and Etsy.

Linking up with Kathy

The "I got out of the house" Weekend

I actually ventured out this weekend. I learned that I currently have about a 2 hour limit on public appearances, but it was wonderful to be out and to see a lot of friends.

It was Pride Weekend in Columbus. George Takei was the Grand Marshal of the parade, which I think is super cool. We were invited to two brunches on Saturday; I made it to one, which also involved walking about a half mile (that was a little rough so we took a Car2Go home). I did not go to the parade.

Our flags; a necklace that I wore as a bracelet

Saturday night a bunch of us went to see Ben Folds play with the Columbus Symphony as part of the Picnic with the Pops series. I wasn't sure how this would go for me, but I really wanted to see/hear Ben. It worked out well for me that I didn't have to walk far at all and I was hooked up with a sweet reclining chair so I was as comfortable as possible. I did make it for the whole show, but I was more than ready to get out of there by the end. (The concert itself was fabulous!)

Photo on left courtesy of Columbus Symphony Orchestra.
Top right was my view - thank God for the screens on the side.
Bottom right - my peeps gathered around me.

Also on Saturday I was busy following Steph's photos of Relay for Life. I got some texts from her as well to show me these luminaries in my honor:

So cool to have this support from Philly!

And speaking of cancer fundraisers... In late July Aaron is going to ride in the Pan Ohio Hope Ride, sponsored by the American Cancer Association. It's a four day bike ride beginning in Cleveland and ending in Cincinnati (328 total miles). Please don't feel obligated to donate, but if you're looking for somewhere to send your charitable contribution dollars, his page is here.

The Happiest Gwensday

As I mentioned, yesterday I saw the plastic surgeon. I did indeed get those blasted drains removed and I was so happy I could have danced. Except that would have hurt, so I didn't. My new boobs (or "toobs" - boobs made from tummy tissue) are doing great. My stomach incision, not so much. Part of it has separated, which is not uncommon, but it freaked me out. Fortunately it's not infected, but we need to keep it packed with gauze and change said gauze daily. And by "we" I mean "Aaron" and he is oh, so excited about it. This is true love, friends. I go back to see the surgeon in three weeks.

Today I got the best news of all! I saw the breast surgeon. We talked about the fact that there was indeed more DCIS (stage zero cancer) in the right breast and how thankful we are that the mammogram led to the finding of 3 mm calcifications which then led to the realization that there was really 7 centimeters of cancer in that bitch. Since it was all non-invasive and because we took off both breasts, there is no need for chemo and no need even for any hormone therapy or additional treatment of any kind. This is amazing, wonderful news! He doesn't want to see me for another six months.

Last night our niece Jackie posted another of her fabulous drawings of me. For those of you not on Facebook who haven't seen it:

Nice rack, right? She's just awesome.

Again, I can't thank you all enough for all the support and kind words over the last few months.

The Update, Part I - copy and paste style

We like to joke about Aaron's lack of social media use, but he did a great job keeping people on Facebook informed on my progress in the hospital. Today I'm literally cutting and pasting from FB to bring the rest of you up to speed and then tomorrow I'll have brand new information to share with everyone.


First I have to tell you about the amazing support I received on Facebook. Many of my friends changed their profile pics to the Fight Like a Girl logo I've been using. The day of surgery my sorority sisters wore animal print clothing and took selfies (one of them even took her picture in the dressing room of Lord & Taylor because she didn't own anything animal print). There were hashtags all over the place like #InItToGwenIt and #GammaPhisForGwen and one of my friends coined the term #Gwenning, a la Charlie Sheen. It was overwhelming and wonderful and say what you will about Facebook but I felt so much love it was unbelievable. Now, on with the updates:


From Aaron, Tuesday evening, 6/3
All done! I just met with the doctors who did the reconstruction and they finished up about 45 minutes ago. Gwen did great, no surprises. They keep a very close eye on her the next 12 hours to make sure there aren't any clots, and hopefully tomorrow she'll get to eat and start moving around. I can't wait for her to see the crazy amount of support everyone has sent her way today - we are blessed to have so many wonderful people in our lives. #inittogwenit rocks! Hugs to everyone!


From Aaron, Gwensday, 6/4

Good morning everyone - update for Gwen. She had a pretty sleepless night since they kept checking her new parts every hour on the hour, but we've passed the 12 hour critical watch period so that's good. She has some pain but it is being managed well (funny post about that forthcoming), and she is much more alert and lucid than I expected. Today's highlights should include water, solid food, and perhaps moving from bed to chair. Hopefully that journey won't include a trip by the mirror, because she will disagree that, to me, she is presently more beautiful than she has ever been.

Thanks for the messages and words of support - love to you all! #inittogwenit

From Aaron, Thursday, 6/5

And another beautiful morning in central Ohio - here's the latest for Gwen. She continues to improve, highlights from yesterday included getting out of bed to sit in a chair, followed last night by actually taking a walk around the floor. This morning she had solid food for the first time and took another walk. Today she'll continue that progress - looking forward to more walks intermingled with naps and food. Doctors seem pleased with progress, removed some bandages, and she is tracking for potentially being discharged tomorrow.

The well wishes and support continue to be a source of strength and inspiration to Gwen and me, we are very appreciative! Stay tuned!#inittogwenit

From Aaron, Friday, 6/6

We're home!

I brought Gwen home from the hospital earlier this afternoon to continue her recovery. This morning included the removal of many bandages, some walking, and a shower! Now that we're home she's basically been told to focus on managing pain, eating/pooping, walking regularly, and getting plenty of rest. Those of you in the 'hood should see us making trips around the block, which I will time to occur soon after taking pain meds so as to keep her scowling to a minimum. Also she has some restrictions like don't lift anything, don't vacuum or iron, and don't cook but I think she'll manage. Feel free to insert appropriate jokes ...

And once again we continue to be amazed at the support so many of you have expressed. It has most definitely made a difference. Thanks everyone!!

From Me, Saturday, 6/7

Hello friends! It's really me, posting from the comforts of home surrounded by pillows and one cat next to me on the bed (Clover/Mr. Handsome).

All things considered, I'm doing very well. I haven't had one bit of nausea, thank God, because that would have been seriously beyond awful. I'm glad that the doctors and nurses all commented on how good the incisions look because I think it looks very Frankenstein-ish, swollen and bruised and with blisters from tape, which was a new experience. I came home with four drains, so Aaron and I are "enjoying" a different kind of intimacy while emptying those twice a day.

As Aaron has mentioned, we are constantly overwhelmed by the outpouring of love and support. People I don't even know changed their profile pictures. Even my friends are amazed by my friends, if that makes any sense. I tried to keep up with all your comments and someday I hope to be able to answer messages. Please know that I've read them all and I so appreciate all the love.

In terms of the cancer, I've been told that I won't need chemo and there's nothing invasive, but just in case I needed validation of my decision to remove both breasts, I got it. In my right breast, where we knew there had been cancer, they found even more DCIS(stage zero) and in the left breast they found atypia, which does not always turn into cancer but I think we all know that I made the right choice.

I had not talked about this publicly but the reconstruction route I went with is called a DIEP flap. That means that they took tissue from my tummy to make new boobs so instead of implants, it's all my body (and yes, that means I got a "bonus" tummy tuck out of the deal). That type of surgery is why it took so long - 8 hours, I think - and then I had some breathing issues afterward so it took another 3 hours or so to get to my room. This surgery also requires a longer recovery time but I'm on the right track so far.

I have so many people to give thanks for, but right now, since I've been long-winded and I'm getting tired, I'm just going to point out the Best. Husband. Ever. (Okay, also my only husband ever, but still...) I can't imagine getting through this with anyone else. I love you, Aaron. 

Thanks for reading!

So Much Thanks

You guys! I'm so overwhelmed by the support and love following Thursday's post. My phone, email, Facebook all blew up with good wishes. Thursday night I went to choir rehearsal as usual and everyone was wearing these ribbons:

Thank you Molly, for making this happen!

Like I said, overwhelming.

Everything went very well on Friday. I arrived at the hospital at 7:45 and was home by 2:00. The whole weekend was a combination of napping and watching TV and movies. Sunday I was allowed to shower, which was both refreshing and exhausting.

Our niece Jackie drew a new picture of me. She's just the best!

I got flowers, chocolate-covered strawberries (thanks, Marla and Steph!) and these pralines from a mystery gifter. Anyone wanna 'fess up? There was no note and my investigative skills have been fruitless.

Today I'm still taking it easy but the beauty of working from home is that I can still be somewhat productive while healing. I'm sore but as long as I don't do anything silly like try to change my shirt without thinking, I'm OK. I should have pathology results this week, so fingers crossed that it is indeed the stage zero cancer.

You suck, cancer, but my friend is still here

This is my 200th post! I can't think of a better use of that milestone than to celebrate someone who's been through the ringer but still plugs away with humor, sarcasm and yes, sometimes rage and tears.

Fellow bloggers understand what it's like to meet new friends online and develop relationships even though you've never met in person. Way back in ye olden days of 2000, I met a group of women online. Many of us are still in contact to this day and most of us have met others in real life. Honestly, some of my closest friends are part of this group, and I've talked about some of them before (one of them is Steph).

We've seen each other through marriage, divorce, children, death and illness. More than a few women have had bouts with cancer (and one is currently going through a second bout, different than the first). About eight years ago our friend Lisa was diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer. She was 42 at the time, with a five-year-old son. She has beaten the odds and she's still with us.

We gave her the nickname Lisa Lisa (as in the Cult Jam) and still refer to her as LLCJ. When we first "met" my screen name was GAC23 and she said it reminded her a a cat hacking up a hairball. I changed it, but she still sometimes calls me GAC. In 2001 I was fortunate enough to go to New York City and sing at Carnegie Hall with the Columbus Symphony, and I was even more fortunate to be able to meet Lisa and a couple other "imaginary friends" for lunch.

Me, Lisa, Karen, Alyssa
April, 2001

Lisa actually cringes when October rolls around with all its breast cancer awareness and pink vomit. She says "fuck awareness, find a damn cure." But when the Today Show was looking for breast cancer patients for a makeover segment, they contacted Lisa's doctor, who nominated her.

That segment aired yesterday and the clip is below. Please watch my beautiful friend and see her transformation and her story. For me it brought back a flood of memories, because I've known her through all of this.

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Love you, LLCJ!

Happy Gwensday!

I love the crescent moon....

Come on girls, sing it with me!

So today some fellow bloggers are having a Greek is Greek linkup, and when I realized that three of the four co-hosts were in the same sorority as me, I knew I had to participate. Granted, I'm much older than these ladies but I'm here to tell them (and you) that being in a sorority has lifelong benefits.

When I went to college in (gulp) 1985, I had no intention of going Greek. Back then at Wittenberg, rush wasn't held until winter term, so by the time it rolled around, I had friends who were Greek, my boyfriend at the time was Greek, and other freshman friends were rushing so I did, too. In 1986 I pledged Gamma Phi Beta.

Pledge night (that's me on the far left).
I'm happy to say that I'm still in touch with all the other girls in this picture!

Our composite picture, before we went to wearing all the same thing.

While sorority life during college was fun, I had no idea how much it would mean later in life. And while people often bitch and moan about Facebook, I will always be grateful that it reconnected me with so many of my sorority sisters. There's a group of us in Columbus/Dayton who get together for lunch (hey, let's do that again soon!) or drinks, and I often see Facebook posts of other reunions. Last fall several of us gathered when Christine was in town for work.

Sorry about the demon eyes - I can't seem to fix it

In January, 16 ladies met up in Florida for a mini-reunion. I was sad to miss that one!

Candy, my sorority sister, fellow Columbus-ite and blogger at Bird Uncaged (where she lists something she's thankful for everyday, wrote this:

"You may not be able to put your finger on the reason why you feel so comfortable the minute you walk in the door, in the moment. But 25 years later, after you have seen each other through marriages and births and divorces and death, or maybe you haven't seen each other at all, but you can sit down in a room together and talk and laugh and cry as if not a single day has passed, THEN you will understand why these beautiful women are your sisters."

Today I'm grateful for my sisters.

You're the Inspiration

Too cheesy? Oh, well.

Today two of my favorites, Helene and Sarah, are doing a linkup asking "what inspires your blog posts?" This has the potential to be a heavy topic, but if you're even a semi-regular Gila Monster reader you know that my blog posts go all over the place. One day I'll talk about civil rights, the next I might be talking about my nail polish of the week or my cats.

As you know if you've read my little bio blurb over there on the right, I'm an accountant. People are often surprised by that, and frankly so am I a lot of the time. I've always had a knack for numbers, but I suck at science so trust me, those two don't always go hand-in-hand. I've also always had a love for reading and writing. In high school I once aced a paper on "The Old Man and the Sea" without reading the book or even the Cliffs Notes (my love for reading as a 16-year-old didn't extend to Hemingway). I also had a paper entered into some contest after totally bullshitting my way through it (and likely writing it at the last minute). The topic was freedom and all I remember is that I twisted it around and the title of my paper was "Freedom?" By the way, it didn't win but that was expected since it was a bit controversial.

In college, I've mentioned before that I originally wanted to double major in business and music but didn't do it. What I did was immerse myself in the English department as much as possible. I took English courses whenever I could to fulfill the various liberal arts requirements. I also worked in the department, eventually proofreading tests for professors.

In my accounting career, I've often been asked to proofread reports (accountants stereotypically suck at writing). But I've always wanted more. I don't write in a diary, but a couple years ago I finally got up the nerve to start this blog. I really only shared it with family and friends and Facebook, but then I got brave and jumped into the blogging community and now it's out there for all to see. Or not. Regardless, I'm so grateful for the ability and the outlet to share my feelings or rantings or observations.

Most of my posts aren't thought out too far in advance. Sometimes I stare at the blank page and then all of a sudden I remember something I saw the day before and the words just come out. I certainly get inspired by other bloggers and linkups are often really helpful to jump start the creative process. And I'm inspired by knowing that people are actually reading what I have to say, no matter how goofy it may be some days. In the blogging world I'm not a big blogger. I don't have a massive number of followers, at least not that anyone else can see. But I often have people tell me that they enjoy my blog, and I didn't even know they read it!

So to each of you reading out there, even though I can't see you, I "see" you. Thanks for keeping me going.

Happy Gwensday!

Gwensday Gratitude

So I'm in a bit of a slump right now. Writing, reading, working, working OUT, eating right ... I don't feel like doing any of it. It could have something to do with the high temps and 874% humidity. I'm also desperately hanging on until Friday, not just for the weekend but because I have a hair appointment and my hair is just ridiculous right now. Yes, I'm vain. I own it. Moving on.

I was just going to skip blogging today, like I did yesterday, but then I pulled up Steph G's blog, Insert Classy Here, where she has a Wednesday Gwensday linkup about gratitude.

So all those things above that I don't feel like dealing with? Let's flip that around.

Writing - I'm grateful that I have this little piece of the blog world to utilize that creative side of myself that doesn't get to shine in most of the rest of my life.

Reading - I'm grateful for the love of reading that I've had since I was a wee child, and that I share with my mom. My books aren't going anywhere; they'll be waiting for me when I'm ready.

Working - I'm grateful that I have a job.

Working OUT - I'm grateful that I have a body that works, however out of shape it may be.

Eating right - I'm grateful that I can afford to eat at all.

That felt kinda good. Thanks, Steph!


Happy Gwensday!